Am I ready?

For nine months, my wife and I spoke about the different things we intended to experience with our newborn daughter. From picking out matching outfits to teaching her how to do the latest dance craze — and recording her progress with high hopes of going viral. The possibilities were as endless as our imagination.

But we’ve come to the realization that it just doesn’t work that way (at least for these first few months).

I am not trying to scare new fathers, but I must say that the first time you hold your newborn child, all “plans” go out the window. Although said plans may be attainable somewhere in the distant future, when you hold that very petite human being — that you are now fully responsible for — things tend to get a little more “real” than you anticipated. The fairytale stories are fascinating when your child is in the womb, but once they’ve entered the world, reality hits you harder than an angry Mike Tyson in the 12th round of a PPV fight. The first few moments are monumental, to say the least. Once those feelings of overwhelming joy and happiness settle, you are left with a healthy dose of anxiety and confusion and plenty of questions. It is scary and it’s the truth.

Am I sure I’m ready to be a father?

What if something happens to my child, who do I call first?

Are they going to cry all day or all night? And if they do, what do I do?

Shit…

These are only a few of the questions I asked myself after everything really set in for me as a first-time father. My guess is that 99% of supportive fathers have asked themselves the exact same questions. It’s a big step in life, one you can never be fully prepared for. Because before your child came along, all you had to do was worry about yourself and your significant other. Now, you have a small human being who is going to look to you for everything. To feed them, clean them, make sure they are healthy, educate them, teach them right from wrong, and most importantly protect them.

Excuse me while I rant about protecting my child for a second.

So the other day before heading to bed, I was holding my two week-old daughter and watching CNN. She slept peacefully in my arms as the news of the day — crazy stuff happening around the world — flashed across the tv screen. I had to ask myself, “how am I supposed to protect her from everything in this cruel world?”

I realized that I can’t, which is a frightening thought to even write. The only thing I can do is teach her to be a good person, and help her become educated and (hyper) aware. Living in fear and teaching her to fear will do her no justice. All it will do is create a wall of resistance; she’d never be fully able to experience the amazing things this world has to offer.

It hit me that I can only protect her as much as life allows me to. She’ll have to learn on her own, eventually…

Okay, back to regularly scheduled programming.

These kinds of thoughts will race through your head constantly as a new father; you have to take a deep breath and know that you will figure it out. We never realize how smart, strong, or ready we are for the things this world throws at us until failure is not an option. Yes, there will be times when you may need to ask for help. There will also be countless times in when you won’t know exactly what to do, but you learn, learn, then learn some more along the way.

Experience is the best teacher, and it’s going to help you get through this like you have gotten through everything else in your life.

YOU GOT THIS!

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