Beauty in the Unknown

When I first laid eyes on my boy through an ultrasound, the feeling was impossible to put into words. I gave the ol’ fist pump, the kind that Tiger might’ve done after sinking a big putt on Sunday afternoon. I kissed my wife. Hell, I might have kissed the doctor. I blacked out.  

And then when the adrenaline wore off a bit, I started balling. I kept telling myself, I have the opportunity to raise a young man. To grow with him. To experience the highs and lows of his childhood with him. To help him when he gets cut from a team. To console him when a girl breaks up with him. To always have his back. To be his best friend.  

Of course I’m nervous, I never thought I would have a boy! And being a rookie in this situation, I don’t care how many parenting books you read, there are just some things you have to go through blindly and learn on the fly. But I believe the moments in my life — the tough times and the good times — will help me make the best decisions I can…they just may not always be right, so little man is going to have to learn what patience is ASAP lol.

Living abroad poses its challenges almost on a daily basis. I’ve called five countries home in my five years playing ball in Europe (Lithuania, Belgium, Spain, Turkey, Serbia). The loneliness is what gets to you first. I’ve loved basketball since I can remember. I’m so grateful for everything it has done for me, and the financial position it has put my family in is something I couldn’t have found in any other profession at this age. I sacrificed a majority of my childhood pursuing my dream. Knowing all that, stuff like loneliness eats at you, but it doesn’t have to break you. You roll with the punches that come with life 5,000+ miles away from your comfort zone.

I’ll never forget the rides to the airport to drop my wife off and say goodbye when she came to visit every few months those first two years. I got so sick of them that I married her (there are a few other reasons why I married her as well), and we don’t make those rides too much more. I was nervous about how she’d respond when she first came over for my third year. But she became used to the lifestyle faster than I thought she would. We did Murcia, Spain and Eskişehir, Turkey and then this past season we were in Belgrade, Serbia. It’s never going to be perfect wherever you are, especially when you’re away from all your family and friends for nine or ten straight months, and this is what has made us grow even closer and have such a strong bond with each other.

I have my concerns about bringing my son over to Europe. But as the man of the house, I love to think that whatever problems come our way, there will be a solution that comes with it. I’m asked all the time about where we will have the baby. Because my wife is expecting to give birth in mid-late October — a few months after I need to report — she’s going to stay stateside in Buffalo, NY. But whenever I get that call that it’s time, no matter where I am in Europe, I’m catching the first plane home. The whole scenario isn’t ideal. But our lifestyle presents obstacles like this that you overcome together.  

It will be painful having to go back to Europe without them and then patiently wait until they come over (which will most likely be around Christmas — thank god for FaceTime!). But I’m lucky to have teammates and friends in Belgrade who will steer me in the right direction for things we need like the best doctors and pediatricians in the area when they do arrive. Usually families back home use the same doctors, hospitals, etc. for generations and build a relationship that allows them to feel as comfortable as possible. It’s something my wife and her family have here in Buffalo. But when you use a doctor on the other side of the world and their English isn’t the greatest, you don’t get that same feeling and you start doubting whether or not it’s even worth it. So you have to make the best decision that you can make with all the info you have in front of you and trust it and have faith.

Our journey is going to be a crazy, well-traveled one. My kid will have more stamps in his passport before he’s even one than both my grandparents combined. We will have countless stories to tell and moments to reflect on. I can’t wait to meet you JJ (Jacob James Baron). You haven’t taken a step on this earth yet, but you’ve made your parents the happiest people on it.  

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