Not Just for Mothers?

On April 14 at exactly 6:49 am, the doctor asked my wife to extend her arms and pull our daughter out of her birth canal. Every emotion imaginable ran through my body at that moment. Thoughts of every kind battled for real estate in my head. My gross motor skills shut down momentarily — I was in shock. I knew my life had just changed forever.

I stood by my wife, staring at her while our baby girl laid snug on her chest. All I could do was smile. Tears rolled down my cheeks. A few moments later, the first words left my mouth:

Thank you, God.

It was the best day of my life, but it didn’t take long to ask, “what now?”

We experience these amazing, enormous moments, yet after they pass we are left almost dumbfounded by thoughts of what happens next.

I have never been a father before. Sounds straightforward, but it’s actually more complex than I could imagine. I have to now raise a child with my wife. I have never done this. I am asking myself a million questions that I don’t have the answers too.

Through her nine months of pregnancy, my wife watched YouTube videos and read articles on how to be a first-time mother. When I looked for similar resources for first-time fathers, the offerings were limited to say the least. “You’ll figure it out” were familiar words from friends and family; and no doubt I planned to. But some things to look out for would have been nice. I’m not saying that books and articles would have had all the answers to my questions, but something, anything, could have been helpful to equip me and other expecting fathers with a dose of much-needed confidence and encouragement.

Through The Fatherhood Blog, I hope to shed light on the perspectives, the challenges and the growth of fathers. I want it to be a conversation-starter, and a resource for information. Experience-driven, straightforward, accessible. A place that people from all walks of life can turn to — to read, understand and share.

I definitely don’t want to diminish the importance or significance of a mother’s role with their newborn child. My goal is to provide a contrasting (and complementary) angle, through the father’s eyes.

Nature plays a vital role in connecting a mother to her child through the process of pregnancy. Fathers find themselves in a bit of a different position. Although a child may share their father’s DNA or even hear his voice while in the womb, the bond truly begins once the labor stage is over. That’s the journey I plan to document with my daughter over the next year — the personal experiences that I encounter for the first time with my first child.

I will write about the times parents share willingly..,such as first words and first steps. And I will also speak to the everyday challenges that I and many other fathers face. I hope to give perspective on the role of fathers raising their newborns and try to help fathers understand that many men are and have been in their shoes.

If I can be voice of confidence, reassurance and affirmation for those taking the beautiful journey into fatherhood, I will accomplish what I’ve set out to do.

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